I work with couples.
Couples come to therapy for many different reasons, but always with an understanding that there is an unacceptable level of distress and/or dissatisfaction within the relationship.
The work of couple therapy is to explore and understand what each partner within the couple needs, and to identify and understand what changes are needed to bring the relationship to a different place. Emotional connection is crucial to this process, when we cannot find love and connection in the reltaionship the emotional distress and chaos in us deepens.
Couple therapy holds an understanding that each of the couple brings to the relationship their own way of relating to another, and this is based on early learned patterns of behaviour and relating. When there are difficulties in a relationship it is useful to identify how these learned patterns and behaviours might be present in the relationship. This offers an opportunity to facilitate understanding and hence an exploration of change and healing.
Healing is about finding a place that holds some resoloution and the potential to move forwards for each of the couple.
“Romantic love is not the least bit illogical or random, but actually an ordered and wise recipe for survival, it is an attachment bond” – Dr Sue Johnson
“Essentially, the task of the therapist is to move back and forth slowly exploring each partner’s experience in the relationship and offering an empathic response to the underlying feelings and fears of each person.” – Jim Crawley and Jan Grant